January 27, 2006
Are Women Necessary
That Milton High School father-son duo may be on to something!
Maybe instead of adjusting our school systems to level the playing field we should just get rid of women in Massachusetts altogether. Or at least send them west of 495, there’s plenty of real estate for them to do the gathering.
Think about the upside of this idea.
Men could once again rule the land.
Make business deals with a handshake and a bourbon.
Tell stories suitable for the locker room in the board room.
Cut the commute driving time in half. Not because there would be less traffic, but because the road would be filled with uni-taskers who know where they are going and know the speed limit is more of a suggestion than the rule.
Spit and cuss anywhere they damn well please.
Read Hustler magazine on the train.
Drink Cosmo’s, and other fruity drinks.
Keep the boutique shops, salons and day-spas in business.
Move to the South End.
Acquire a lisp and lose the Boston accent.
Wear Gucci and Prada.
Walk our toy breed dogs around the Common.
Wait, this isn’t working out, why are all the guys flipping to the gay side? Come back ladies! We’ll behave. We’ll listen. I promise!
“What do you mean I have to do the dishes and pick up after myself? Go back to the Berkshires! Ronald never spoke to me like that. I miss Ronald.”
Filed under: Today in Boston
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